How to stop overthinking at night.

The house is quiet, the phone is down, and your mind picks exactly this moment to replay a conversation from 2019. Overthinking at night is common. During the day, work and noise keep thoughts busy. At night there is nothing else competing for attention, so whatever you have not dealt with gets louder. The good news is that a few small habits can give those thoughts somewhere else to go.

1. Give your worries an earlier appointment

The NHS suggests setting aside “worry time”: a short slot of 10 or 15 minutes, well before bed, to write worries down and look for solutions. When a worry pops up at another time, you tell yourself you will deal with it then. It sounds too simple, but it teaches your mind that the thought has a place, and bedtime is not it.

2. Empty your head onto paper

Keep a notebook by the bed. When a thought loops, write it down in one line, along with anything you are worried you will forget tomorrow. The point is not to solve it. It is to stop your brain from holding on to it as if you might lose it.

3. Sort what you can act on from what you cannot

Look at your list and ask of each item: can I do something about this? If yes, write the first small step and when you will do it. If no, notice that, and let it sit on the page instead of in your head. The NHS calls this approach the “worry tree”: separating practical problems from hypothetical ones that are out of your control.

4. Say it out loud

A thought that has been circling for an hour often sounds smaller once you hear it. Try finishing the sentence “The thing that is really bothering me is…” out loud, to yourself or into a voice memo. If you are not sure what the feeling is, the feelings wheel can help you put a word to it.

5. Slow your breathing

A racing mind often comes with a body that has not switched off either. Breathing in for four and out for six is a gentle way to settle. Our breathing timer can guide you, with voice cues if you want to keep your eyes closed.

6. Don’t fight to fall asleep

Trying hard to sleep tends to keep you awake. If you have been lying there for a long time and feel wide awake, it can help to get up for a few minutes, sit somewhere dim and do something calm and boring, then go back to bed when you feel sleepy.

7. Protect the hours before bed

The NHS sleep advice includes going to bed and waking up at around the same time each day, avoiding caffeine and alcohol for at least six hours before bed, and putting your phone away. A short routine that tells your body the day is over, like our 10-minute wind-down, makes the switch easier.

A quick routine to try tonight

1. After dinner: ten minutes of worry time with a pen and paper.
2. Before bed: write tomorrow’s three things down, then close the notebook.
3. In bed: a few minutes of longer out-breaths.
4. If a thought comes back: “That’s for tomorrow’s worry time.”

How Hilo will help

We are building Hilo for moments like these: talking your day through with a companion before bed, parking what is left for tomorrow, and ending with a short guided breath, all by voice. Join the waitlist to hear when it is ready.